That was me. I was coming out of graduate school, and knew that I wanted to focus my career on organizational development. But, I was fearful about one aspect of it; facilitation. I had well-meaning people share their fears for me (not exactly affirming), telling me how difficult it can be if analytical types didn’t want to learn. I had my own fears, too… how could a more reserved person like myself (for those playing at home, I’m a S on the DiSC profile), become a facilitator? What if people didn’t like what I had to say? What if I couldn’t manage the group? What if people didn’t get to speak their minds? Or, yikes…. what if they did?
What I started to begin to realize, while working with an incredible group of top-notch professionals (you know who you are) were two things: Facilitation is a skill. And, it’s not about me.
So, the good news is that facilitation is a skill and can be learned. It’s like anything else that you can develop. Sure, it helps if you are process-oriented. If you are confident in your knowledge. If you like people. If you are a good listener. But, ultimately, it’s a skill that can be learned, modeled and replicated. With feedback. And support. And, we can get better.
What perhaps was even more insightful was when I realized it’s not about me. I internalized the idea that I’m there for the sole purpose to help other people grow. To help other people develop. To help other people process information. To help other people be heard. That was the game changer. I stopped worrying so much if I was on pace with the timing, and instead focused more about asking the question that no one was being asked. I stopped worrying if I was on the right page of my manual, and shifted my attention instead to the shy person (who hadn’t spoken) to make sure they had a chance to voice their fears. And, I stopped worrying about whether I was getting my point across, and decided to focus on asking and listening to theirs.
When I adjusted my mindset, everything changed for me. I actually remember looking back to the exact moment when I wasn’t aware of myself anymore, and was truly present and focused with them. I moved from performing, to connecting. This can happen for you, too.
If you are interested in Facilitation Skills for the Reluctant Facilitator for yourself or your team, please contact jane at jane@hintzlearning.com.